A Big Fat Waste of Time

Ad Icon Smackdown! Who will win? Advertising Week New York 2004. Believe the Hype.

Well, we're going from Blacksploitation and female objectification to the personification of animals and giant household serving utensils. ABFWOT now directs you to Advertising Week New York 2004. Apparently, it's the ad industry's (and this would be the industry that pays the rent at our house) attempt at one-upping fashion week. (After all, we made those skinny whores.) We are all very excited about the unlimited potential of this first annual New York adstravaganza honoring "Madison Avenue." (FYI New York Ad Week People--whoever's writing the copy for this thing should be told that the term, "Madison Avenue" is a huge red flag that you are an industry outsider, since all but the crustiest dinosaur agencies left Madison Avenue 20 years ago--I'm just saying). At long last, my esteemed colleagues and I are getting the public recognition we deserve for such contributions to society as "Plop Plop Fizz Fizz" and "Where's the Beef?" No longer will we be marginalized by awards like the One Show, D&AD, The Andy's and other funny looking statues that no one in their right mind gives a crap about. It doesn't happen till this fall, September 20-24, (FYI again--A week has 7 days), but what would a "week" honoring advertising be without an annoying teaser campaign to overhype the event a month ahead of time? So, to that end, won't you submit your vote at the Yahoo! Favorite Icon and Favorite Slogan polls ? (A final FYI and then I swear I'll shut up--no one in advertising says, "slogan". It's "tagline".) Your votes will help determine the inaugural inductees to the "Madison Avenue (I'm not saying anything) Walk of Fame." Yes, there's going to be one. And, apparently, you can vote often, so do. If you want. I don't care. I'm not trying to sell this without getting paid first.

Stop using sex as a weapon

I just read a depressing article on Adrants about Los Angeles WNBA team the Sparks and their female "tactical marketing" director who has decided to pose nude holding a basketball with the WNBA logo on it in Playboy magazine rather than pay the $25,000 Playboy magazine placement fee for a more traditional print ad promoting the team. I just want to say thanks to this woman for setting the WNBA back 50 years, (and it's only 8 years old), and furthermore, thanks for more permanently removing any credibility these female athletes might have managed to squeak out after a lifetime of toiling away in a gym for little to no compensation. And, lastly, thanks for further ingraining into the minds of any little girl WNBA fans out there, (and, believe me, I've been to a few WNBA games as I had to write a television commercial for one a few years back, and there are nothing but parents and their little girls at these games), that no matter what they might accomplish in life, even professional grade athletic prowess, they're still only as valuable as their tits are perky. The saddest part of all is that it WILL work and the Sparks will probably see the highest ticket sales figures in the history of their team.

LA Sparks Use Nude Playboy Spread to Boost Ticket Sales from Adrants

Employee of the Month Sparks Interest Espn, via Adrants

Hipsters Just as Racist as all the other Gringos

A friend in Chicago just pointed out to me that in addition to the Chicago Tribune owned rag Chicago Red Eye publishing a giant, racist-ass, cover headline describing African-American, U.S. senatorial candidate from Illinois Barack Obama as a "FRESH PRINCE", D.C. Wonder Wonkette has now gotten in on the act with their own KKK-ready sub head, Once you go Barack, you never go back! Proving that, as much as your banner caricature may look like Lisa Loeb, you can still be a cracker.

Convention Bloggers: All Obama All the Time from "Honkey"ette

7.29.04 Update: I was just reminded by an inside source over in Wonkette world that guest editor Boi From Troi is responsible for the Obama comment mentioned above. I'm not really sure how that changes anything. Your name is all over it, bois and girls.

   

I got a new camera phone

Now you can count on me to provide oodles of content via very small pictures of my life that you can't really make out.
Today's installment: How I spent my Saturday.