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A post no one will ever read about Brownsville, Starbucks and the Apocalypse

I thought I'd seen it all when, on December 25, 2004, I woke up in my hometown of Brownsville, Texas to a white Christmas. A snow-covered, sub-tropical, border town--the southernmost town in the continental U.S.--covered in palm trees that were covered in snow. The last time that happened was 109 years before.

But, today's news from Brownsville...well it truly is a signpost on the road to the Apocalypse. Many New Yorkers were up in arms when the first Lower East Side Starbucks opened, but for me, the truly disturbing new location has just opened on the Lower East Side--of Texas. Yes Panchita, there is now a Starbucks in Brownsville.

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Call Timothy "Speed" Levitch

  • This used to list Speed Levitch's phone number, but it doesn't work anymore. Now all I have for you is an old quote from his answering machine, which is pure poetry.
    "I am lack of coordination being utilized. I am dysfunction gazing into the eyes of function. I am quieted, odd, menaced awkwardness dying at the altar of suave. They call me Levitch. Leave me a message."
  • Who?

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