A Big Fat Waste of Time

Will America have no heroes left? RIP Larry "Bud" Melman

Larry Bud Melman guest-starred with Run DMC in their King of Rock Video. What have you done with your life?

Last night I learned the sad news that Larry "Bud" Melman, the androgynous, gnome-like creature of Late Night with David Letterman fame, died at the age of 85 on Long Island leaving behind no survivors and requesting no funeral. Melman was such a well regarded cult figure in the 80's and 90's that my roommate named her plant after him in college. Astoundingly, it wasn't pot. So this really does mark the end of an era for an entire generation of Letterman fans. I'd like to take this opportunitiy to remember Calvert DeForest, (his real name), who may have been too modest to want a funeral, but who will be memorialized in our hearts forever as the only man(?) who could simultaneously make us laugh and remind us of that creepy uncle we try never to be left alone with at family gatherings.

LARRY 'BUD' MELMAN SHUFFLES OFF MORTAL, LATE NIGHT SIDEKICK COIL , from Defamer

Calvert DeForest , IMDB profile

King of Rock Video Link (Cuz they wouldn't let me embed that shit) , YouTube

Tshirt Hell Addresses a Nation in Mourning

We haven't yet discussed the recent death of Captain America here on ABFWOT. That's mainly because I don't give a shit. But I was very tickled to read T-Shirt Hell's take on the whole situation in their monthly newsletter. I find in trying times like these, they always help me put things in perspective.

And finally, a bit of sad news as Marvel Comics killed off the legendary superhero, Captain America. Thankfully, Captain Mexico will do his job for $3.15 an hour.

HO! *rim shot*

The Mid-March Thing from Tshirt Hell

Are you watching, Dan Wieden? This is how we do it.

Flea Market Montgomery, Director's Cut
This spot should win the Cannes Grand Prix.

A little Gay Lick for you

I spent St. Paddy's Day trying to hide out from the hords of vomiting frat boys who invaded my East Village neighborhood by 9am. (Special shout out to those drunken sluts who rang my door buzzer at midnight. It's cool, it was only REM sleep.) So I'm just now getting around to doing my annual St. Paddy's Day nod.

As witnessed by yesterday's marathon of merriment, the Irish are synonymous with festive gaiety. So what could be more appropriate on this weekend of Irish pride than a clip of the exciting climax of the 2006/07 Mr. Gay Ireland competition? I dare say, nothing. And, as YouTube commenter, NudeYork, asks, "What did he do for the talent competition?" Indeed.