When I was about 11 years old, The Pirate Movie played constantly all summer on HBO. I became obsessed with it. Not having a VCR, I recorded it on my audio tape recorder and listened to the music over and over again in my room at night. (How weird was I?) Imagine my delight when I saw that it was coming on television this afternoon--on my day off. I'm DVR-ing it now and marveling at the strange sensory-memories coming over me as I watch. A more ridiculous movie has never been made and it makes me believe in happy endings again.
Back in high school, (yes I am THAT old), my best friend (gay) and I used to rush home after school to watch "Dance Party USA" with his older brother (also gay) who was in college. We weren't watching because we idolized the show. We were actually watching in utter disbelief of the amount of cheese produced in New Jersey (the home of the show.) But today when I looked up some old footage of it on YouTube, I was shocked to see how fucking hip the whole thing appears 20 years later. Or is it that the hipsters in Williamsburg are just super fucking dorks? Yeah. That sounds better.
This used to list Speed Levitch's phone number, but it doesn't work anymore. Now all I have for you is an old quote from his answering machine, which is pure poetry. "I am lack of coordination being utilized. I am dysfunction gazing into the eyes of function. I am quieted, odd, menaced awkwardness dying at the altar of suave. They call me Levitch. Leave me a message."